Sad at love

  I bought a diary. when we broke up,

Hoping to write all the memories and stupid things we've done when we're at our best.

I never understand why it is happened ?

Why it's happening? I only knew that it's hurting, bothering....................

And i am like forget her dharma, now she's at good place.

i have done my best like million efforts, i mean that's a lot of efforts.........wait what?

None of them means a thing to her.

Now you're like tumor in my body,

i can't stop writing poems about you.

Days gone all alone in a room, me my pen and diary talking about you.

I mean, i living my strangest days same as you wondering, figuring, how i am gonna survive. Thought the meaning of your survival is novel than mine.

Once, after work, we took a bus all the way to Dhulikhel only to spend a night there.

Till now i am unable to figure out why you kissed me first? why i kissed you back? 

Like what i did to your body,

I let you hold my hands, taste my lips, smell my body like you're my angle. You're wearing a white shirt which i does not like at all. And i still want to fuck you.

You told me, once, i like to get to know about yourself more, that day when i am fucking you, i feel like my story is in the pocket of my jeans. That is at left side of our bedroom staring, during my ejaculation i try not to cry, i laugh.

nowadays, i buried my expectations. 

I try to forget about our memories like a puff of smoke. 

I kissed the sky more times than i ever i kissed you.

I go to bed with the hope that i completely forget about you,

But the very next morning my cerebellum works perfectly.

                     📝=Dharma acharya